Wow... I guess it's been a while since I touched "ye old xanga" Journal...

Not a damn thing going on here...

The only big happenings that happened over the last couple months...

1. I'm getting more and more into bumness...

2. I got a bi monthly spot DJing at Connect 4 @ Velvet Lounge...

3. I'm getting stupider every day...

4. I'm 23 now...

5. I've been playing GunBound every fawken day...

6. Salah came back from Cali...

7. 3 weeks of Drinking...

8. Salah Leaves Back to Cali...

 Now I'm back to NOTHING... Bumming it up... watching lots of TV... and catching up on my Real World San Diego or "Jamie Vision" as I like to call it... I notice now that some channels that Stray away from my Big 3 Channels actually have quite good programming now... I dunno when it happened but TBS is starting to become the shit!...

Other than that... Been playing Lots and LOTS of Gunbound... Alright... so I got hooked... a bit too quickly... basically it's a korean based tank battle game like Worms... but played world wide online... I know I can't say much to describe it... but as a fair warning it is highly ADDICTIVE... and it goes great with beer... See for yourself... http://www.gunbound.net and it's FREE!!! Well... unless you don't have much patience... then you can buy items for your character... I go by Shinchan808... challenge me if you want...

I don't know what to think....

Rearranged

Lately I’ve been skeptical
Silent when I would used to speak
Distance from all around me
Who witness me fail and become weak
Life is overwhelming
Heavy is the head that wears the crown
I’d love to be the one to disappoint you when I don’t fall down

But you don’t understand when I’m attempting to explain
Because you know it all and I guess things will never change
But you might need my hand when falling in your hole
Your disposition I’ll remember when I’m letting go
You and me we’re through
And rearranged

It seems that you’re not satisfied
There’s too much on your mind
So you leave and I can’t believe all the bullshit that I find
Life is overwhelming
Heavy is the head that wears the crown
I’d love to be the one to disappoint you when I don’t fall down

But you don’t understand when I’m attempting to explain
Because you know it all and I guess things will never change
But you might need my hand when falling in your hole
Your disposition I’ll remember when I’m letting go
You and me we’re through
And rearranged

You’re no good
For me
Thank God it’s over

You make believe
That nothing is wrong until you’re cryin’
You make believe
That life is so long until you’re dyin’
You make believe
That nothing is wrong until you’re cryin’
Cryin’ on me
You make believe
That life is so long until you’re dyin’
Dyin’ on me!

You think everybody’s the same
You think that everybody’s the same
I don’t think that anybody’s like you
(you ruin everything and you kept fuckin’ with me until it’s over and I won’t)
You think that everybody’s the same
I don’t think that anybody’s like you
Be the same

Just think about it
You’ll get it

- Limp Bizkit

I'm situated in a situation where I don't even know what is the right thing to do...

In this situation there are 2 Perspectives...

Both Have it's good's and bad's...

Tho... The Good's are at the expense of the other's bad...

I Already Made the choice...

Now I just gotta Live with it.

Money or Happiness....

The question has come up to me... Indirectly... but I got to thinking... Possibly it was an irrational decision when I actually thought about it... cause I was feeling a little depressed at the time of thought... But when I thought about it.... It didn't really seem all that irrational at all... it actually made sense....

I came to the decision that I'd really take money over happiness...

People in general almost always say happiness... without putting a single thought into it... because naturally everyone wants to be "HAPPY"

The other general portion... who say they rather have money... are usually people who are business motivated... And have no time for the proverbial "Happiness"... cause "making" money makes them "Happy"...

Then there's me... and my thought that destroys everyones bubble...

I Believe... that Money CAN Buy Happiness... and that "Making" money doesn't really make you "Happy"... Yeah sure you could be doing something you like that pays you money... But's let's face it... NO ONE Really LOVES their job that much... Deep within... there's still the piece of your mind that says " WHY do I do this everyday?... Why Do I even Bother?... blah blah blah" There IS a difference between "Enjoyment" and "Happiness"...

The reason I came to the conclusion that I would take Money over being eternally happy is... because EVERYTHING takes MONEY... I don't care what you say EVERYTHING TAKES MONEY... I know you're probably thinking... "Oh... but... money doesn't buy you Love... Money is the Root of all evil... blah blah blah".... WRONG... Money is the ROOT of EVERYTHING!... EVILNESS, HAPPINESS, LOVE, LIFE... All rooted by MONEY...

All Evil: Yes, People with lesser money or in Despirate NEED of money... Will do ANYTHING do have MORE of it... it could be the last resort, Unmorallistic, and the Irrational things known to man... but if you think about it... Is Money really the evilness? or is it MAN's Neverending Persuit of "Happiness"?

Happiness, Love, and Life: No... Happiness, Love, And Life DOESN'T GROW ON TREES! No matter how much you will argue about this with me... Plain and simple... MONEY Turns the world... The only thing that's free in this world is knowledge and wisdom...

Money buys happiness... You just need to know how to spend it... Hell... spending it... makes people happy... if you do it correctly... happiness comes in all shapes and sizes...

Just think of all the things that make you HAPPY...

If you buy something MATERIALISTIC... It brings TEMPORARY Happiness...

If you buy Something THOUGHTFUL... it contributes to ETERNAL Happiness...

If you buy the SUPPLIES... You can Create Happiness from the HEART....

If you buy the TICKETS... You can Experience Happiness in a RARE way

HAPPINESS doesn't come without a price...

Money Doesn't make you A Sweetie...

Buying Flowers Does

Buying Dinner Does

Buying The Construction Paper to make the Valentines Day Card DOES

Buying The Computer to Photoshop your Valentines Day Card DOES

Wisely Spent Money MAKES you A Sweetie... Then the rest is up to your personality...

I think you get the picture... Sometimes people gotta think REAL... granted... you don't need TONS of money to be happy... but it still takes just a little bit... to keep you in that flow called life...